


Pizza Parties and Tow Trucks

by Bionerd2Point0



Category: Batman - All Media Types, Red Robin (Comics)
Genre: (is it ever not a happy ending with me?), Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Attempted Kidnapping, Established Relationship, Fluff, Fluff and Humor, Gift Exchange, Gift Fic, Happy Ending, Humor, M/M, Minor Angst, Shenanigans, Surprise Birthday Party, Tim Drake Birthday Hunt, Tim runs into many problems, mostly focuses on Jason and Tim, tim in a suit
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-19
Updated: 2020-07-19
Packaged: 2021-03-04 21:01:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,675
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25372807
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Bionerd2Point0/pseuds/Bionerd2Point0
Summary: He took the stairs down to the executive level of the parking garage, avoiding the trap that was elevator pleasantries, and breathed a deep sigh of relief at the sight of his car—one of the less flashy ones, today. Sliding into the driver’s seat, he stowed the bag away, buckled in, and put the key in the ignition. Tim twisted the key.Nothing. Not even a click.Fuck.
Relationships: Tim Drake/Jason Todd
Comments: 20
Kudos: 184





	Pizza Parties and Tow Trucks

**Author's Note:**

  * For [rare_colours](https://archiveofourown.org/users/rare_colours/gifts).



> This was written for the Tim Birthday Hunt, in which we all created works secret-Santa style, then figured out who created for us by messaging everyone else in the event for the 5 emojis to lead us to the right person! (I’m writing this beforehand, but I imagine it will be mass chaos lol) [It was!]
> 
> With that said: Here you go Fonzie!! I wish I knew you better before I had actually finished this, I would have tried to include some puns. XD I hope you like it anyways, pun-less as it is, it’s pretty fun. :) It’s loosely inspired by something that happened in real life to a coworker, except he had our boss’ keys, so there was arguably more drama. I hope that all of your birthdays - surprise or otherwise - go more smoothly than this!
> 
> Enjoy!

Jason glanced down at his phone, checking the time. Tim would be getting home in roughly thirty minutes, but it was still a bit too soon to get everyone in their hiding places. An eclectic mishmash of vigilantes and metas wandered around his living room, most of them holding cups of punch and plates loaded with the cheese, crackers, and assorted vegetables that he had set out as appetizers to keep the masses happy.

Closed pizza boxes rested on the island, and Tim's specially made pizza was hidden away in the oven, in case _some people_ (Bart) got too enthusiastic. He’d have to turn the oven back on in twenty minutes to finish cooking it anyways, so it was a good storage spot.

Jason was pretty proud of himself for putting this together, especially since Tim seemed to have no idea it was happening. A surprise birthday party was pretty expected, yes, but Jason had thrown enough red herrings pointing towards something this weekend that he felt safe in believing Tim would honestly be surprised tonight. He just had to get home from work first.

At 5:07 his phone buzzed with an incoming message.

> **Babybird** : Meeting is running long, won't be home till 6?
> 
> **Jaybird** : </3 Okay. Text me when you're on your way, and stay safe! 
> 
> Making a special dinner tonight :*
> 
> **Babybird** : Can't wait! <3

"Alright, people, Timmy's running late, so we can just hang tight for a while. I'd guess six as the new go time, but I’ll keep you all updated."

A cacophony of affirmative shouts echoed through the room, and Jason did his best to ignore the fact that he really didn't know most of the people here all that well.

"Nervous." Cass, as always, startled the shit out of him by appearing at his elbow as only she could do.

"Yeah, a little." He tucked his phone into his pocket, turning to face her. "Bit more expectation this year than in the past."

'Bit more expectation' was a bit of an understatement. Last year, he and Tim had only been together for six months and had spent Tim's birthday apart because Jason had gotten stuck in space with the Outlaws. The year before that, Jason had dropped a container of waffles off at one of Tim's safehouses, only to realize Tim had never actually received said waffles because he had been out of the country. The year before _that,_ Jason had accidentally kicked the kid into a thug and gotten him shot, which was honestly the turning point of their relationship, and it was safe to say any years prior to that, Jason was less than mentally stable and more than a little murderous. This year was the first year he was really able to go all out and celebrate his babybird's birthday. He was pretty anxious, wanting to make sure everything turned out right.

Cass laughed softly and tapped his shoulder lightly. She knew as well as he did; no plan survived first contact with the enemy.

* * *

Tim nodded along with Mr. Smith, smile tight as he eyed the clock behind the board member's head. It was his birthday, Jason was making a special dinner for him, and he should have been on the road forty minutes ago. Hell, even Tam had left for the day already.

The marketing director _finally_ wrapped up his presentation, which could have been summarized as "this quarter saw a 12% increase in publicity from new marketing techniques" instead of a three hour powerpoint. Oh well, it was over now, and that was all that mattered.

“Thank you, Mr. Smith, that was very informative. You covered any question I could have had, and I think it’s late enough that all other inquiries can be directed to you via email later, if that works for everyone else?” A quick glance around the table confirmed that the rest of the board members were just as eager to leave as he was. “On that note, I hope you all have a good evening, and I will see you at tomorrow’s meeting.”

Stacking the marketing portfolio onto his laptop, Tim shoved both into his messenger bag as quick as he could while still being subtle. Ms. Davis beat him as the first person out of the room, but Tim was second in offering the room a respectful nod and lengthening his stride to escape. Freedom, at last!

He took the stairs down to the executive level of the parking garage, avoiding the trap that was elevator pleasantries, and breathed a deep sigh of relief at the sight of his car—one of the less flashy ones, today. Sliding into the driver’s seat, he stowed the bag away, buckled in, and put the key in the ignition. Tim twisted the key. 

Nothing. Not even a click.

Fuck.

* * *

> **Babybird** : I’m in my car now, but it won’t start. I think the spark plugs are bad. 
> 
> Calling to get a tow truck out, once it gets here I’ll just take a cab home.

Jason frowned at the message. It was almost 6:00, making this a twelve hour shift for Tim, so he had to be exhausted.

> **Jaybird** : Shit baby, I’m sorry. If you put it in neutral and roll it a bit, it should start up and you can drive home
> 
> I could fix it for you then? 

The response took a few minutes. Tim was either trying his suggestion or he was calling for a tow truck.

> **Babybird** : No dice :/ Gonna take 30 min for the tow to get here, but I’ll text you when I get a cab. 
> 
> Sorry I’ll be late for dinner 
> 
> **Jaybird** : No no, it’s fine babybird! I’ll hold off so it stays warm. 
> 
> Want me to come pick you up?

Grabbing the pan out of the oven, Jason moved to cover it with tin foil and stash it in the fridge until he had a better ETA. 

> **Babybird** : Nah, it would take just as long as the cab, and I know you’re cooking. 
> 
> I’ll be home in ~1 hour. Love you!
> 
> **Jaybird** : Love you too! Stay safe
> 
> **Babybird** : Always!

Jason took a deep breath, metally shuffling the plans for the evening and eyeing his living room filled with people. Okay. It was fine. He could do this.

“Hey, guys, Tim’s car won’t start, so he’s waiting on a tow and then catching a cab to get home. It’s gonna be another hour before he gets here.” He could _feel_ the pressure from the restrained groans. “I’ve got some more snacks I’ll put out, and we can go ahead and pull out the games I was saving for later. If anyone needs to head out, just let me know.”

Variations of “thanks, Jay!” echoed around the room, and he pulled out Tim’s collection of board games to set up in different areas, hopefully enough to keep everyone entertained. 

He refreshed the bowls of chips and pulled out the veggies that hadn’t fit on the tray earlier.

Everything would be fine.

* * *

Tim tapped angrily at the game on his phone. He refused to go back into the building and get sucked into another project, meaning he was stuck in his car, and the damn tow truck was _running late_. 

He beat another level of Candy Crush. Then his phone flashed to the power screen and went black. The battery had died. What was up with his luck today? 

This was extra not good, since he hadn’t texted Jason his new ETA. Eyeing his laptop, he wondered if he had enough of a wifi signal to send Jason an email to let him know the situation, but a rumble from down the garage drew his attention. The tow truck had arrived, _finally_.

They were lucky Tim habitually backed into his parking spaces, so it didn’t take too long for the mechanic to hitch up his car and agree to bring it to Tim’s preferred auto shop—which was definitely closed at this point. He could call them in the morning.

With that taken care of, he watched the truck drive off. Tim waved as it turned the corner, only to realize his messenger bag was still in the car. 

Taking a deep breath to keep from screaming, he calmly walked up out of the garage to the street. He could have one of the receptionists call him a cab if it came down to it, though this late in the evening, it should be easy to flag one down.

* * *

> **Jaybird** : ETA? :)
> 
> **Jaybird** : You okay?
> 
> **Jaybird** : Tim, give me a call?

Jason stared at the string of texts spanning the past thirty minutes. Not a single response. He tried calling, but it went straight to voicemail. That suggested Tim’s phone had died, which… was not ideal, to say the least.

For the first time that night, Jason felt a real bolt of anxiety go through him. Enough that it sent him to their room to pull out a tablet and access the Bat-network to see where Tim’s comm was. The comm pinged back from Regan’s Auto, which was a slight relief because at least Tim wasn’t totally off the radar. It also wasn’t _good_ because Tim hadn’t been planning on going to the mechanic tonight.

It was okay, though. It was fine. Jason had a house full of supers, and every last one of them would be more than willing to step in front of a bullet for Tim. (Most would come out without even a scratch.)

“Hey, Kon?” 

Kon looked up from The Sheriff of Nottingham at Jason’s call.

“Could you tell me where Tim is in the city? I think his phone died, so I can’t get a hold of him.”

Kon blinked in surprise. “Yeah, sure, one sec.” Furrowing his brows, he looked to the side, listening for Tim’s heartbeat. “It sounds like he’s closer to us than Wayne Tower, listening to some kind of… Indian pop? Oh! He’s in a cab. But they’re not moving.”

Okay, he could work with that. A cab stuck in traffic was totally normal. “Thanks, dude, I appreciate it.”

As if summoned by fate, less than a second later, Jason’s phone lit up. That would be fine, except Dick, Cass, Steph, Babs, and Duke’s phones _also_ pinged. 

Well, shit.

* * *

Tim’s fingers tapped spastically against his thigh. His phone was dead, he had no way of occupying himself, and the cabbie seemed to be ignoring him as she bopped away to a personal playlist of what appeared to be Bollywood hits.

Scooting forward, Tim leaned close enough that he could be heard. “Hey! Is there any way we can get around this?” he shout-talked over the music. A hand wave encompassed the blockade of vehicles, all honking with angry drivers yelling expletives at one another. He could see smarter drivers in the far left lane making illegal U-turns to get out of the mess.

“Nope.” The cabbie kept bopping her head, singing under her breath.

Exasperated, Tim slid backwards and let his head thump against the back of the seat. Truthfully, they really were stuck. They were in a middle lane, and no one was moving on either side of them. He’d make better time walking. In fact—

Tim pulled a fifty out of his wallet and tapped the cabbie’s shoulder until she looked at him in annoyance. He waved the fifty, gave it to her, and let himself out of the car. 

He was three miles from the townhouse, but at this point it might be good to walk off some of his frustration before he got home. Hopefully Jason wouldn’t be too worried.

* * *

Oswald fucking Cobblepot had broken into the Gotham Zoo and was holding everyone in the aquarium hostage, because of-fucking-course. Jason had to put down his phone to prevent himself from throwing the damn thing.

Duke, bless his soul, spoke up first. “Bruce and Damian are already on their way, and I can go as backup. It’s Penguin, so the rest of you should be fine to stay as long as you’re on alert.”

Which would be fine, except they all got a second alert with added information that apparently the entire scheme was due to the fact that the Zoo curator owed Cobblepot money and would need a security detail until they were sure it was safe.

“I’ll go,” Cass offered, coming over to rest a hand on Jason’s shoulder. “Not ruined, just off book. Police will come, we will trade, I will come back.”

That meant she’d watch the guy, vet the security detail, and come back to the party. Okay.

“Alright. Take some pizza with you, both of you.” He nodded towards Duke and turned towards Barbara. “Babs, I know you’re itching to move. Tim has a command center downstairs; elevator access is across from the bathroom sink in our room. You should have the clearance to get in.”

Her shoulders relaxed in visible relief. “Thanks, Jay. Keep your comm in, and I’ll keep everyone updated.” 

“Kon?” Jason turned back to the Kryptonian. “Where’s Tim now?”

“Closer than he was earlier.” Kon didn’t even hesitate before replying, which was a relief, because that meant he had stayed keyed in on Tim’s heart. “Heart rate kinda elevated, but, like, jogging-on-a-treadmill elevated, not running-for-his-life elevated.”

* * *

Tim took measured breaths, steadfastly ignoring everyone around him. Was jogging in a three piece suit weird? Undoubtedly. But this was Gotham. These people had seen weirder shit.

* * *

It was 7:53. The chips were gone, bowls licked clean. The cheese tray was a fond memory, and the veggie tray had been decimated. Jason had caught a few of his guests eyeing the last glob of veggie dip in the bottom of the bowl, and suffice to say, everyone was more than a little hungry. 

A blur of color flashed across the room, and a very nervous Bart appeared in front of Jason.

“Hi, um, Jason.” Bart was literally vibrating in place. “I know we’re waiting on Tim, but… it’s been a while since I had lunch, and I ran out of protein bars. Speedster metabolism, yanno?”

Jason did know. He dreamed about the days when he didn’t know about the horror that was Bart and Wally eating. Back when he had been naive and innocent. 

“Anyways, um, if you’re cool with it, I’m just gonna run down the block and grab some burgers, ‘kay?”

On one hand, Bart really didn’t need to ask permission to feed himself. On the other, Jason had bought seven pizzas specifically for Bart.

He eyed the heroes and two civilians who were all not-so-subtly eavesdropping on the conversation and gave in. At this point, he was more worried about Tim than he was about throwing the perfect surprise party.

“Fuck it,” he muttered. “Hey, everybody! I’m gonna start heating up pizzas. Pretend to be civilized and _share_ while we wait for them all to warm up.” Tim’s was the only pizza that Jason had made himself, sourdough crust and all, so for the others, it was simply a matter of broiling them until sizzling and sliding them back into the box. 

Bart ate his first three pizzas at room temperature (cold pizza was acceptable, room temperature pizza was a crime), but everyone else was more than happy to wait until Mama Esposito’s pizzas were heated to perfection. 

Jason’s expectations were back in the realistic range, and it would be fine. He even managed to grab a slice for himself. Now they simply needed to wait for Tim to get home.

* * *

Tim sat back in his second cab for the day, panting for breath. Whoever thought jogging through Jersey in a suit in July was a good idea was an idiot. (Newsflash, it was only him.)

The AC was a lifeline, though, thankfully turned up full blast by “Call me Darren” who seemed nice enough. 

All these things combined meant that it took Tim a solid ten minutes to realize they were going the wrong way.

* * *

It was 9:27, and Jason was officially losing his mind. Kon had said that Tim had moved farther away for a period of time, and Jason was ready to throw the whole night out the window and drag Tim home himself. (With Kon’s help. Jason wasn’t actually sure he could find Tim on his own at this point)

The only thing keeping him in place was that Tim’s heart rate stayed steady and that he was more than capable of taking care of himself if it came down to it. It did very little to help Jason’s anxiety, however, which had the side effect of putting everyone else on edge.

A scrape of keys alerted him to someone at the door, and Jason wasn’t about to wait and see if it was Duke, finished with Cobblepot already. 

He yanked the door open with more force than necessary, revealing a startled and bedraggled Tim on the doorstep. 

“Jesus Christ, Timmy.” One big step closed the distance between them, and Jason pulled his boyfriend in tight. “I could strangle you right now. You scared the shit outta me.” He nosed into Tim’s hair, breathing him in, sweat and all. 

“Sorry,” Tim said, pressing his forehead into Jason’s collar bone and hugging him back tightly.

Jason pulled back enough to look Tim over. “What the fuck happened?” He didn’t look injured anywhere, merely rumpled, sweaty, and doing his best impression of mad scientist hair.

“My phone died right when the tow truck got there, and I left my messenger bag in the car and didn’t realize it until it was too far away to catch. Got stuck in traffic with my first cab and decided to just walk home, but it’s hot as hell out there, so when I got a chance, I caught a different cab. The cabbie’s name was Darren, and he was really nice, but he sorta half tried to kidnap me, ‘cause a gang was trying to initiate him, and he recognized me as a potential target to skip the hazing. We talked it out, though, and he’s gonna start working for the Wayne Foundation on Monday.”

Jason stared at him, not even knowing where to begin processing all of that. 

“Surprise!”

Both of them jumped. Tim, however, jumped three feet back, skipped the stairs, and landed on the sidewalk in a defensive position, ready for the threat. 

Jason turned to the side, still processing everything as Kon, Cassie, Bart, Dick, Raven, Connor, Ives, Tam, Steph, and Cass crowded the foyer. He didn’t know when Cass had finished staking out the zoo curator. He hadn’t even realized she was back. 

Tim gaped at them all, struck speechless.

Pulling himself out of his stupor, Jason waved a hand back towards the group in the house. “Happy birthday, Timmy. We ate all the pizza and Babs is in the basement messing with your computer.” 

Tim’s dumbfounded expression made Jason review his wording.

“Well, every pizza except for your pizza. Your pizza is in the fridge. I only half baked it, so you’ll have to wait a little bit for it to be ready. The ice cream cake should be ready, though.”

“I… wait. What? I thought my surprise party was for Saturday?”

Jason smirked and shook his head, finding his mental footing. “Nah, Saturday was the distraction. Babs coordinated with everyone for today, I just fake coordinated for Saturday.”

“So… Everyone’s been waiting this entire time?”

“Yeah,” Kon said, making his way out of the house towards Tim. “Duke had to go help Bruce with a thing, and he should be back soon. I’ve been supersense stalking you too, to keep everyone updated, and Tam is totally cheating at that Sheriff game.”

“You—you’re friends with Tam now?” Tim looked pale, and rightfully so. Jason had been pretty surprised at how well she got along with the Titans too. 

“Dude, we’ve had, like, six hours to bond over your self-care habits!” Connor shouted from behind Cassie.

“Hey, fuck you!” Jason hollered back. “I feed and water Timmy on a regular basis now. We have a schedule!”

“Oh my god.” Tim buried his face in his hands.

“Not on your space missions!” Cassie piped in, oh so helpfully.

“Alright, everyone. Back inside. We’re letting the smog in and if my ceilings turn yellow, I’m gonna be pissed. And for the record, Wonder Brat, I leave Tim with frozen meals, switch all his coffee to decaf, and swap the caffeine pills for sedatives before I leave.”

“You _what_?!” Tim twisted around, trying to resist Jason’s herding.

“Hush. You brought this on yourself,” Jason said dismissively. He looked up when his sixth sense tingled and found that he couldn’t spot a certain speedster. “Bart! Step away from Tim’s pizza, right now! You won’t like it, it’s got pesto instead of red sauce.”

Tim latched on to the new information. “You made me sourdough pesto pizza?”

Jason grinned down at him. “Yup. With chicken, artichokes, bacon, and onion.” 

“Okay, I can maybe forgive you for the coffee thing, then. But we are _talking_ about that later.”

“No, we aren’t.” Jason was beyond confident in that matter.

“Uh, _yes_ , we are.”

“No, because if we have to talk about it, then I’ll have to tell Tam just how many of my fake caffeine pills were missing last time I came back from a mission.”

Tim’s mouth snapped closed, and Jason knew he had won. He couldn’t help but laugh when Tim started cursing under his breath. 

“Happy twenty-fourth birthday, babybird,” he whispered and pressed a kiss to the top of Tim’s head. “Love you.”

“Yeah, yeah.” Tim twisted up to peck him on the lips. “I love you too. Now go make my pizza.”

“Aye, aye, captain!” Jason grinned cheekily, giving Tim one last squeeze before letting go and heading towards the kitchen. This wasn’t the surprise party he had planned, but it was okay. Tim was here and he was safe and he was happy, and that, truly, was all that mattered.

**Author's Note:**

> This work of art was bae-ta'd by the absolutely lovely Feriswheel, who is an angel for putting up with my nonsense. XD ILY ERI!!!!!


End file.
